“When you judge you project your shadows onto others. When you love you project your inner light.” - Aine Belton

I've always been intrigued by the degree to which those things which bother me about other people are often the things that I like least in myself.

Perhaps it's my own worries and insecurities--the fact that I haven't figured out how to overcome or come to peace with something--that makes them particularly prickly for me. As a parent, my shortest fuses were in situations where I felt most unsure.

It's tragic to think that our own insecurities can so easily create confusion, doubt, and fear in another. Our heart breaks for the child who is on the receiving end of an adult's insecurity.

When we feel calm and confident, we are much more capable of being generous about others' shortcomings. Their difficulties don't threaten us. We feel some sense of confidence that we can help them.

Projecting light is a powerful image for helping another, especially a child. Illuminating the areas of darkness for them, providing a bridge across the shadows of fear. Showing confidence in the ability to deal with and overcome life's challenges.

Our ability to influence others truly depends on who we have become.